Learning How To Find Your Blissful Marriage

Today marks 19 years of marital bliss for my husband and I. However, "bliss" as defined by Merriam Webster, and "bliss" as defined by a marriage veteran would be defined in very different ways.

The dictionary version is brief, "complete happiness, paradise, heaven." This type of bliss is short-term in duration. So 19 years of marital bliss would seem like a conflict in terms. However, let's consider the "veteran" portion of the viewpoint.

Marriage Veteran

When I think of an armed services veteran I think of someone who is brave, puts the needs of their country over their personal needs, committed, determined to win, honest and willing to sacrifice for the greater good.

A marriage veteran would possess similar qualities. Their bliss would include passing through the challenge of merging two lives into one that is better, yet not loosing the individuality of either life.

What Really Is Bliss?

Bliss would include the courage to allow the evolution of the individual and partnership. It includes give and take, but may seem like there is more giving than taking, but that's okay.

Blissful experiences would include early morning snuggling, late night laughing, walks in the woods and enjoying a sunset.

However, blissful experiences would also include journeys that are difficult like working together to insure that income is sufficient to cover outflow, and trusting your spouse to choose you over other distractions of the world. It is often when these journeys are completed that the blissful moment comes.

Marital bliss takes on a whole new meaning when children enter the scene. It is broadened to include a heart expanding love that you didn't know you possessed, and new veteran opportunities that may smell, leak, cry and hug. (This description includes both babies and teenagers!)

Marital bliss isn't a perfect marriage, but the perfecting of two individuals who are better as one.

Truly Committed Marriages

Does marital bliss last past the honeymoon? In a truly committed marriage the bliss takes on different forms and lasts a lifetime. So why doesn't marriage always feel like bliss? We all know that anything worth doing well, isn't very easy and that means that bliss can be painful.

When questioned about troubled marriages, Dr. Phil responded, "...overall people in America quit too soon. Too many people are divorcing these days around the 2 year mark saying that marriage just wasn't what they expected and they're worn out."

Worn out! Most couples don't even know what worn out means until they've gotten a minimum of 2 children through their toddler years! Marital bliss means you are in it through the long haul. Knowing joy, pain, love and sorrow will be an intrical part of that journey.

Amazingly, my blissful marriage includes Websters definition as well. I've found "complete happiness" because my husband has helped make me complete. I'm in "paradise" when I'm in his loving and protecting arms, and "heaven" when he tenderly touches my face and expresses his love to me.

So where are you in your journey of marital bliss? Whether you are just finishing your honeymoon, or welcoming a great grand child into the family circle, bliss is what you choose to make it...so make it a grand experience and enjoy the journey!