Shy Guy Dating Tips And Concerns

By Francis K Githinji

Shyness can get in your way when it comes to dating. In the dating scene, there is no room for shyness because you will possibly lose many opportunities. If you are naturally shy, you have to learn how to deal with it or better still use it as an opportunity to give you success in dating. Shy guy dating can be attractive to the daring type of girls. I know of a friend who would be looking in a shy guy's eyes and feel good to see him blushing and looking away. This women will view this as a romantic move but this type of women are few. Many women want a confident man who will not shy away to talk to a woman and get what they want.

If you are a shy guy dating you need to put up a confident face. Maintain that charming smile, those flattering eyes but no matter what you do, do not look away. It might be interpreted that you simply do not mean what you say. This is not what you want. You want her to take your word as the gospel truth. To achieve this, you should learn to maintain direct eye contact. The eyes say a lot since they are the window to the soul. The temptation to look down might be great but as a shy guy dating you have to be courageous. You have to say and do what you want to avoid the risk of having your woman leave for a not shy guy.

If you are a shy guy dating, you have probably noticed your woman is unhappy about your failure to handle big crowds. Her friends' opinion might improve your relationship or send it to the grave. If you cannot entertain them and talk confidently in public, you might be called a coward. The friends will bad mouth you and help your woman look for some one of their choice. As much as we would want to deny it, peer pressure plays a major role in our social life. If you are shy guy dating, you have to prove your worth to the group and this won't pass unnoticed. Word will soon reach her that you are a great guy.

As a shy guy dating, you have to control your nerves until shyness becomes a thing of the past. Possibly you were not born shy but it comes along with tension. Once their is tension you cannot put the act together and you blush anyhow. If you meet a woman you would want to date, you do not have to be tense. Relax and present your motive. Take a deep breath and maintain your calm. Shy guys are known for ear to ear smiles. Apply it while approaching a woman for a date. Work against shyness because it gives you failure with women. You might be drop dead gorgeous and handsome but when a woman who was previously attracted to you notices that you can't hold a glance, she will have doubts in you. It might be a complete turn off for women.

Francis K. Githinji Is An Online Dating Expert. His Latest Project Shy Guy Dating Shows How The Power Of Online Dating Can Be Harnessed Internationally and With Great Success, Or You Could Post Your Valued Comments On His Blog At Shy Guy Dating

Win The Dating Game

By Lori Grudzien

Why is it some people look at dating as a game while other look at it as serious "soul mate searching"? That all depends on what you searching for; a friend, a lover, or are you searching for a true lifetime commitment?

The existence of this game makes sense. Most people do not want their choice of mate to be the first person who comes along. So people explore various partners in hope of finding a good match. Some will be winners, but some will be losers in this game. Others who have played the game now have a clear idea of what they are looking for in a mate and are more inclined to settle down into a serious relationship. They key is to find someone who is at the same stage of the game as you are.

There are some people who believe they are ready to settle down but have not yet opened their minds and hearts to a real relationship. These people usually have rules that they believe they should adhere with when entering the dating world. While their intentions may be good, in their minds they have a picture of what their "perfect" soul mate will be. The problem is no one could possible ever match up to this so-called "perfect mate. So the question is are they in or out of the game? While they may truly feel ready to settle down, in reality they still date continuously trying to find the one that measures up to the standard they have set.

This brings me to a best selling book called "The Rules". This book explains how women should play hard to get if they want to get their guy. I know women who actually use this book as their guide to find the man of their dreams. They follow the advice on how to be mysterious and appear exciting, only to have it fall apart. So what�s the problem?

Well when you believe you are ready for a serious relationship and instead of going into it honestly and openly you portray a character from this "dating guide", you�re not being honest and are not being true to yourself. What happens when you fall for this person and want to become more available? What happens when you�re tired of playing the role of the ever exciting date and you need to get real? If this relationship is ever going to evolve you have to be yourself sometime. Will your potential mate still be interested when you�re suddenly available to spend every Friday night with them?

The answer is; before you can label where you are in the dating game you have to figure it out yourself. Real people want real relationships, not dates based on a set of rules and guidelines. Of course there are still general criteria people have when looking for a potential mate, such as, location, moral values etc.

Your journey will require the need to look within yourself, and discovering what you type of relationship you are truly in search of.

This Article is property of LifeChoicesWeb.Com. You may re-print this article for your e-zine or website along with this attached credit information and link. Copyright 2005

Lori Grudzien is the Managing Editor of the website LifeChoicesWeb.Com, a website dedicated to �Living a full life, by learning to love yourself�. Topics include Health, Aging, Divorce, Relationships, Career, Stress, Anxiety, Self-Esteem & Self Help.

Am I Weird If I Date Online?

By Devlyn Steele

True story: A few years back I was working with a client who had recently moved to Los Angeles. She was single, did not know many people in the big city, and felt a little lonely. I innocently suggested she give online dating a shot. It seemed like an easy and pressure-free way to meet people, and I had other clients who enjoyed their experience and were in good relationships as a result.

"What kind of desperate person do you think I am?!?" she snapped.

She apologized, but explained that she felt �weird� about online dating. This perked my curiosity, so later I asked some of my other clients if they ever tried it. Some only confessed after their faces turned three shades of crimson. Since I am a strong proponent of online dating, I dispel any stigma or embarrassment when I recommend it to my clients. This is what I tell them:

For many singles, life moves like Richard Petty around the Talladega Speedway. We change jobs every few years. We relocate more frequently. We cannot remember the last time we answered a phone with a cord. Even if time is not the issue, some single people cannot shake the feeling that everyone else is happy while they are always alone. We may look at online dating as an act of desperation, because �normal people don�t need something like that.�

The simple fact is that you are not weird if you use an online dating service. We only feel weird when we think we are doing something outside the norm. Consider this: over 40 million people in the US access online dating websites every month. It is the fastest growing sector of online content. There is no reason to feel embarrassed, because if you date online you are actually part of a huge group.

There is nothing wrong with wanting to find someone special, or at the very least make some new friends, so why not use every resource available to you? You do not get extra points for meeting someone in a bar or while waiting for dry socks at the Laundromat. Does it matter to you how you met the important people already in your life? You probably barely even think about it.

By setting up a personal profile and a list of likes and dislikes, you invest time in yourself. More importantly, you are taking action by trying to improve yourself and your situation. You are putting yourself out there and taking control by refusing to be lonely and isolated.

I have found many advantages to the Internet. The anonymity of online dating allows you to roll out of bed, hair standing in ten different directions, breath smelling like Boston Harbor at low tide � then click! You stumble on a person you will be dating in a few weeks. The cost compared to going out and searching is next to nothing. You can learn more about a person�s interests to see if they mesh with yours. You do not have to deal with the harshness of rejection in person. You have a huge pool of people to explore (remember, 40 million!) from all walks-of-life, people you would never have the chance to meet within your neighborhood or small circle of friends.

There is also fraud and deception. You will probably come across a photo that looks eerily like Pamela Anderson � right down to the copyright in the lower corner. Clients tell me about married people posing as single. Nevertheless, these issues of honesty exist both on and off-line, so do not let that stop you from finding the partner you want.

With 43% of the U.S. population being single and with so many single clients asking me about Internet dating, I began to put a guide together to help my clients use this service effectively and safely and avoid these pitfalls. I want everyone to find the happiness they deserve and want to make this Tool book available to everyone for Free! To get your free E-Book, �Tools To Internet Dating� go to TheRelationshipTools.com and get your copy today.

Don�t be ashamed or afraid, learn the best and safest way to use the Internet to take control of your life and find the person you deserve!

About The Author

Devlyn Steele ("America's Leading Life-Coach") has been a public consultant and a private counselor for over 15 years. A Cognitive Therapist, Radio host and Columnist, Devlyn also developed ToolsToLife.com. Devlyn maintains a thriving practice in Hollywood, where he counsels famous actors, musicians and captains of industry. Soon his new book will be available, Relationship Tools. You can hear Coach Steele live every Tuesday on LoveBeat Radio 1310 KXAM.com 7-9 PM. Arizona Time

coachsteele@toolstolife.com

Online Dating - 8 Sizzling Tips To Make Your Profile Standout!

By Amanda Lee

We know one of the hardest part of creating your profile is describing yourself to others. Dating pearl.com gives you the freedom to define & express yourself so you can put your best foot forward. Following are some time tested nuggets that can assist you in creating a compelling & attention grabbing profile.

Honesty is the Best Policy

As the saying goes, honesty is the best policy. Honesty is taken seriously at Dating pearl.com and it's the single most important thing to remember when writing a great profile. It's much easier to write about yourself if you are honest about who you are. It prevents you from having to spin ways to best sell yourself or guess at what you think other people want to read.

A major part of being honest is not misleading people down the road. People will assume that what you write is true � and you don't want to set people up for a surprise later by stretching the truth in your profile. For example, if you hate mountain climbing, don't say you love it just to grab the eye of an outdoorsy type.

Give Some Thought Of What Sets You Apart.

How are you different? What gives you your unique character? If your friends were describing you, what would be the three things they would all say about you? These are good questions to ask yourself as you get ready to write your profile.

Put Your Negativity Aside

Often times, people start their ad off with, �I�m sick of � !�, � I�m tired of�!� or � I hate Brunette�!� etc. It�s advisable not to include this as the first thing that you want to express in your profile ad. It just gives the impression of too many unhealthy relationships in the past. Instead, try to be more positive & upbeat in your profile. Soon enough you will notice a leap in the response rate.

Stay Open & Be Conversational.

Leave formality at the door and write your profile like you are talking to a good friend. Of course, there are some things you might tell a good friend that you probably don't want to include in your profile. It's a good idea to avoid mentioning past relationships and exes, or discoursing on being lonely or desperate. Be optimistic!

Show How, Don't Tell.

The best profiles show, don't tell, who you are at your best. If you are known for being funny, try explaining how or why you are funny - such as, "I've been known to show up to a party in a wig", instead of "I have a good sense of humor." Paint a picture in their minds of the kind of person you are.

A Picture is Worth a Thousand Words

The importance of this point can�t be emphasized more. Your smile, the background that you're photographed in, what you're wearing; they all paint a picture of what you're truly like. And including a recent photo will get you 800% the attention.

Updating Your Profile Often.

Keep your profile fresh. Every now and then, go back to your profile and update it to let people know you're still out there.

Go Through Your Spelling & Grammar.

Check your profile for typos and spelling mistakes before you submit it. Show that you spent time thinking about them while writing your profile. Always proofread your ad & run it through a word processor, such as Microsoft Word so that you can have your spelling & grammar checked.

From,

Amanda Lee
Love Editor,
www.datingpearl.com

About The Author

Love Editor of Datingpearl.com

For more information, please visit: http://www.datingpearl.com Online Dating Community with a new twist for Love, Friendship & Romance.

(c) Amanda Lee

Online Dating - 8 Sizzling Tips To Make Your Profile Standout!

By Amanda Lee

We know one of the hardest part of creating your profile is describing yourself to others. Dating pearl.com gives you the freedom to define & express yourself so you can put your best foot forward. Following are some time tested nuggets that can assist you in creating a compelling & attention grabbing profile.

Honesty is the Best Policy

As the saying goes, honesty is the best policy. Honesty is taken seriously at Dating pearl.com and it's the single most important thing to remember when writing a great profile. It's much easier to write about yourself if you are honest about who you are. It prevents you from having to spin ways to best sell yourself or guess at what you think other people want to read.

A major part of being honest is not misleading people down the road. People will assume that what you write is true � and you don't want to set people up for a surprise later by stretching the truth in your profile. For example, if you hate mountain climbing, don't say you love it just to grab the eye of an outdoorsy type.

Give Some Thought Of What Sets You Apart.

How are you different? What gives you your unique character? If your friends were describing you, what would be the three things they would all say about you? These are good questions to ask yourself as you get ready to write your profile.

Put Your Negativity Aside

Often times, people start their ad off with, �I�m sick of � !�, � I�m tired of�!� or � I hate Brunette�!� etc. It�s advisable not to include this as the first thing that you want to express in your profile ad. It just gives the impression of too many unhealthy relationships in the past. Instead, try to be more positive & upbeat in your profile. Soon enough you will notice a leap in the response rate.

Stay Open & Be Conversational.

Leave formality at the door and write your profile like you are talking to a good friend. Of course, there are some things you might tell a good friend that you probably don't want to include in your profile. It's a good idea to avoid mentioning past relationships and exes, or discoursing on being lonely or desperate. Be optimistic!

Show How, Don't Tell.

The best profiles show, don't tell, who you are at your best. If you are known for being funny, try explaining how or why you are funny - such as, "I've been known to show up to a party in a wig", instead of "I have a good sense of humor." Paint a picture in their minds of the kind of person you are.

A Picture is Worth a Thousand Words

The importance of this point can�t be emphasized more. Your smile, the background that you're photographed in, what you're wearing; they all paint a picture of what you're truly like. And including a recent photo will get you 800% the attention.

Updating Your Profile Often.

Keep your profile fresh. Every now and then, go back to your profile and update it to let people know you're still out there.

Go Through Your Spelling & Grammar.

Check your profile for typos and spelling mistakes before you submit it. Show that you spent time thinking about them while writing your profile. Always proofread your ad & run it through a word processor, such as Microsoft Word so that you can have your spelling & grammar checked.

From,

Amanda Lee
Love Editor,
www.datingpearl.com

About The Author

Love Editor of Datingpearl.com

For more information, please visit: http://www.datingpearl.com Online Dating Community with a new twist for Love, Friendship & Romance.

(c) Amanda Lee

Are You Dating a Potential Cheater?

By Ruth Houston

Most single woman seeking a committed relationship would rather avoid dating men who are likely to cheat. But according to statistics, an estimated 50 to 70 percent of men cheat on their mates. How can you tell if the man you�re dating is one of these potential cheaters? Wouldn�t it be great to have this information about him before getting too deeply involved?

Find out If He�s Prone to Infidelity

Studies reveal that some men are more likely to cheat than others because of their background, their past history, or certain character traits. Using this information, I�ve designed a 7-question quiz to help women determine whether or not a man is prone to infidelity.

Single Women Screen Dates with this Quiz

The Potential Cheaters Quiz was originally posted on my website http://www.InfidelityAdvice.com to help married women find out if their husbands are prone to infidelity. I also provided a special report with strategies to help women deal with these potential cheaters. However numerous single women began reporting how they were using the quiz to screen the men they met on dating sites, and through dating services and personal ads.

Decide Who Not to Date

The Potential Cheaters quiz can help you make an informed decision about whether or not to continue dating a man, or how deeply to get involved. By identifying and avoiding the potential cheaters in the dating pool, you can avoid a lot of unnecessary headaches and heartaches.

Rate Your Date with the Potential Cheaters Quiz

Before you fall head-over-heels in love or get too attached to the new man in your life, rate your date�s cheating potential with the 7 questions below:

Potential Cheaters Quiz

1. Does he thrive on adventure?

2. Did he have a great deal of sexual experience prior to your relationship?

3. Does he have lots of female friends?

4. Does he have male friends who are cheating on their wives or girlfriends?

5. Does he have a parent who cheated?

6. Did he cheat in any of his past relationships?

7. Does he feel that infidelity is really no big deal?

What the Answers Mean:

1. Some men enjoy all the suspense, deception and intrigue that go along with infidelity. They�ll cheat just for the �thrill of the chase.�

2. Studies reveal that men who were extremely sexually active before settling down in a committed relationship are more apt to engage in sex outside that relationship. Don�t expect a leopard to change his spots.

3. Close friendships with women are a common starting point for infidelity. Friends can quickly turn into lovers. The closer the friendship, the greater the odds that it will develop into an affair.

4. Never underestimate the power of peer pressure. If his friends are cheating, he�ll soon be cheating too.

5. Infidelity tends to run in families. Children of unfaithful parents are often programmed to follow in their footsteps, considering infidelity to be the norm.

6. �Once a cheater, always a cheater.� There are exceptions, but statistically speaking, if he cheated once, he�s more apt to do it again. His history will probably repeat itself.

7. If he doesn�t believe that infidelity is wrong, his behavior will reflect his beliefs.

Tips on How to Deal With a Potential Cheater

If it turns out you�re dating a potential cheater, or you�re strongly considering dating one, you need to know what to do. Even with only one yes answer on the Potential Cheaters Quiz, there�s still cause for concern. My special report, �How to Handle a Potential Cheater", lists a number of precautions you can take. It also includes several successful strategies to use. To receive a FREE copy of this report ( a $7 value), send an e-mail to: InfidelityAdvice@gmail.com with "Potential Cheater Report� in the subject line.

What Kind of Cheater Is He? - Evaluate Your Results

Generally speaking, the more �yes� answers, the greater the likelihood that a man will cheat. But some answers carry more weight than others, so you�ll want to take a closer look at the results.

If you answered yes to #1, #2, or #5 (but not all three), he�s a POTENTIAL CHEATER who may very well cheat on you if the opportunity presents itself. If you decide to get involved with him, you need to make it difficult for him to cheat. Familiarize yourself with the signs of infidelity, so you�ll know if he starts to stray.

If you answered yes to #3 or #4 alone, together, or in combination with #1 or #2, he�s a COMMON �GARDEN-VARIETY� CHEATER who will cheat if he feels he can do so without getting caught. Your challenge, if you insist on dating him, is to stay one step ahead of him by learning to recognize the early warning signs. If you know how to spot the signs of impending infidelity, you may be able to stop his cheating before it starts, or leave before he breaks your heart. Familiarize yourself with the 21 major categories of telltale signs.

If you answered yes to #6 alone or in combination with #1,#2, #3, #4, or #5 you�re dealing with an EXPERIENCED CHEATER who knows how to hide the obvious signs of infidelity. The most important thing to do if you�re dating this man is learn to spot the subtle signs of infidelity, because these are the signs that will inevitably give him away. Get a good infidelity reference guide, watch him like a hawk, and try not to get too deeply involved.

If you answered yes to #7 alone ( This one�s the biggie!) or in combination with any others, you�ve got a HARD-CORE, HABITUAL CHEATER on your hands who�s probably already having an affair. (You could unknowingly be the Other Woman.) For this man, cheating is a way of life. If you don�t want to become an infidelity statistic, leave this man alone. Should you decide to take on this challenge, you�re in serious trouble if you don�t know how to spot the subtle signs of infidelity. Forget about watching for the usual signs of cheating. This man is an expert at covering his tracks. The best thing you can do is become adept at spotting the subtle signs of infidelity, since there won�t be any obvious signs to give him away. The subtle signs are the ones he won�t even think to cover up. Get the best infidelity reference book you can find to help you recognize these subtle signs. Invest in a copy of Is He Cheating on You? � 829 Telltale Signs which lists practically every known sign of infidelity ( http://www.Is-He-Cheating-On-You.com ) and keep it handy at all times.

Copyright ฉ 2005 Ruth Houston - All rights reserved.

ABOUT THE BOOK:

Is He Cheating on You? � 829 Telltale Signs by Ruth Houston is a comprehensive infidelity reference which lists hundreds of obvious and not-so-obvious signs of infidelity. The signs are grouped into 21 major categories so you can easily find the signs that apply to your mate. This book documents practically every known sign of infidelity.

ISBN: 0-9720553-4-7 � soft cover - $29.95 Available from http://www.InfidelityAdvice.com or 1-800-431-1579 or Amazon.com

ISBN: 0-9720553-5-5 � e-book version with 6 Special Reports and 2 Infidelity Questionnaires - $37 Available from http://www.booklocker.com/books/1755.html

Copyright ฉ 2005 Ruth Houston - All rights reserved.

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Infidelity expert Ruth Houston is the author of Is He Cheating on You?- 829 Telltale Signs, an infidelity reference book which documents practically every known sign of infidelity. Ruth's website http://www.InfidelityAdvice.com provides practical advice on all aspects of infidelity. For a FREE copy of �How to Handle a Potential Cheater", e-mail InfidelityAdvice@gmail.com with "Potential Cheater Report� in the subject line.

Ruth also does personal infidelity consultations. Ruth has been quoted in the New York Times, the Toronto Sun, the New York Post, Cosmopolitan, iVillage, MSN Lifestyle, AOL Black Voices and numerous others, and has been a guest on Good Day New York, TalkAmerica, Telemundo, BBC, CBC, 1010WINS and over 150 other radio and TV talk shows in the US,Canada, Europe, South America, and the Caribbean.

Dating Tip for Women: Don't Work Too Hard

By Terry Hernon MacDonald

Remember Jerry Hall, the model who married Mick Jagger? Jerry was famous for making this statement:

"My mother said it was simple to keep a man. You must be a maid in the living room, a cook in the kitchen, and a whore in the bedroom."

I don't know about you, but if keeping a man meant all that work, I'd have stayed single.

In addition to that pearl of wisdom, Ms. Hall offered this one: "Even if you have only two seconds, drop everything and give him (oral sex). That way he won't really want sex with anyone else."

Poor Jerry. Too bad her mother didn't tell her that if a man tends to want sex with "anyone else," he's not great husband material.

Sadly, despite all her hard work, Mick Jagger continued to have sex with other people and fathered a child with another model during his marriage to Hall. They are now divorced. So much for keeping a man!

The point? No guy is worth running yourself ragged for. Instead of appreciating your efforts, he will likely take you for granted and come to resent you. Think about it: Do you fall for guys who are at your beck and call all the time? They're great for helping you move, but you probably wouldn't marry one.

All right. Let's say you decide to move in with a guy. Before you run out to Bed Bath & Beyond, it's absolutely imperative that you talk to your boyfriend about sharing household chores. It's not romantic, but you'll save yourself much misery in the end. And whatever you do, don't get off on the wrong foot by cooking dinner every night and doing his laundry.

Resist any and all impulses to "wife and mother" the guy. Otherwise, he'll take you for granted, or even worse, marry you and expect you to be his servant for the rest of your life. And that's definitely not romantic!

Allow a man to cook for you for a change. Let him do your laundry every now and then. There's no reason to expect him to be your maid in the living room, cook in the kitchen, or whore in the bedroom, but every once in a while it wouldn't hurt.

Remember: You have a lot to offer (if you don't believe me, take out a pen and paper and write down a list of the qualities that make you special; emphasize things like your sense of humor, leave off your ability to fold a fitted sheet).

Don't let a guy do you any favors. Keep this in mind: You're a great girl, and he'd be lucky to have you.

Terry Hernon MacDonald is the author of "How to Attract and Marry the Man of Your Dreams." Visit her website at http://www.marrysmart.com. Tune into her radio show at http://www.healthylife.net Friday night at 11PM PST.

Dating Tips for Matchmaking and Friend Finder Sites

By Katie Lewis

Three years ago, I met my boyfriend Andy through the well known online dating agency 'Friend Finder'. Since meeting, we have moved in together and are head-over-heals in love. We decided that we wanted to help others that were in the same situation as we were - single and looking for love, so we set about creating a website aimed at reviewing matchmaking and friend finder sites from across the world. We believed that in doing this, we would give people a base to start on when looking for love.

Over time, we have added to that site, as well has creating numerous articles of which this is but one. This article gives you tips on how to create a good profile, and how not to fall into the dozens of pitfalls that there are in the online-matchmaking world.

Setting up your Online Dating Account or Profile

When setting up your online profile, it is highly recommended that you first subscribe or sign up for a free email account which you do not use for business or personal incoming mail. This is simply because if you no longer wish to be in contact to someone, they will not have access to your primary email. Some online dating sights offer the option of signing up for a free email account after you have filled in your profile. This is a good idea, as it provides you with an email that can be specifically used for dating purposes. When you select your screen name, use something that isn�t too intimidating. User names incorporating your own name or something that you enjoy is always effective. Make sure you reflect your personality in a conservative manner. Some examples are �

Craig_surfer30@heartsaffection.com

the.best.kind.of.girl@heartsaffection.com

Foxyfiona@heartsaffection.com

fun_and_flirty@heartsaffetion.com

guyforyou@heartsaffection.com

alan.lawson22@heartsaffection.com

How Are You Feeling Today?

The completion of an online dating profile should be done in the right frame of mind. If you are feeling blue or perhaps lonely, or even not so positive the day you fill out your profile, it will come across that way. Choose a day when you feel happy and positive about your life, then sit down beforehand, grab a piece of paper and a pen and write down your interests, hobbies and your best points and traits. If you make a draft copy beforehand, you will find there are just so many wonderful things about �you� that you want to share with others, you won�t have space in your profile when you come to filling it in!

Be Honest with Yourself�and Others

Make sure you are honest when writing your profile. Good relationships are based on trust and honesty. If you are serious about online dating and are hoping it will lead to a meeting, you need to describe yourself and your personality accurately. There may be some parts of your identity that you wish to remain inconspicuous, but when it comes to appearance, you should describe yourself truthfully. After all, you never know when the person of your dreams will want to meet up with you! If describing your appearance is not your thing and you feel uncomfortable, just add and photo of yourself.

Photos

When attaching a photo to your profile, there are a few key things to consider. The photo you select should portray you accurately. This means not posting the one of you two years ago when you were out at a friends 21st and looked fantastic but had just �10 too many� drink. Is that a true representation of you?

For the best results, have another person take the picture for you. This will allow them to get the best possible effects from light, angle and positioning. If you enjoy the outdoors, have a friend take a picture of you in your beautiful garden with a fresh flower pinned behind your ear. If you prefer the beach, have them take it of you under a shady palm with a huge smile!

It important to appear naturel in your pictures. Dress modestly, or how you would when you were going out on a casual date. The aim is to appear naturel, yet groomed, so smile, sit up straight and be positive! This will shine out to the other person � Gorgeous!

Getting to Know Someone

When you are first starting out with online dating, it can be daunting. The most important thing to remember to is remain truthful to yourself. If you get a negative feeling about a particular person, go with it. If you feel an attachment of friendship forming, see where it leads you. You must remember there is no rush or pressures to meet, fall for or even become good friends with a person, so go at your own pace. Generally, people like an honest, friendly and warm person who is fun to be with. Each individual has their own definition of these traits; it is just a matter of finding someone who is compatible with you.

A good way to let someone you have been seeing online know how you feel about them is to send them an e-card or poem, according to their personal taste. I can be short and sweet, lusty or romantic; whatever you feel is appropriate and will be warmly welcome. Don�t try and overwhelm another person. People do not appreciate this and will find themselves wanting to distance from you. If you are strongly connected to an online partner, feel free to send them flowers or a small gift.

I hope this helps you find the person of your dreams.

For free reviews of matchmaking sites, please visit http://www.heartsaffection.com

Lots of love,

Katie Lewis

CyberDating Lie Detecting

By Kathryn Lord

Did you know that Online Dating is the top moneymaker on the Web? Chances are good that if you are single, you have joined a site or two yourself. If so, you've probably asked my CyberRomance clients' top question too:

"How can I tell if they are lying?" Lot's of ways! Here goes:

First off, much of "the problem" of Internet lying is media over hype. What kind of interest would there be in a story about all the honest people who are on the Net?

But of course some people do lie, and being concerned about who is and who isn't lying makes a heck of a lot of sense.

Reasons people lie:

• To avoid conflict.

• To avoid the consequences of their behavior.

• To postpone having to make changes in lifestyle.

• To hide something they did or did not do.

• To avoid rejection.

• To be in control of a situation.

• To avoid being embarrassed.

• To make themselves appear more successful, good, or talented than they really are.

All make terrific reasons for people to lie online.

How to detect lying:

A truthful person will be "congruent." That means that all the information they give out -- their words, body language, they way they live and dress, everything -- fits together and contains no contradictions. People who lie will be incongruent in some way.

Here's what to watch out for:

1. How they use words: written, on the phone, or in person --

• Talking faster or slower.

• Changes in voice pitch.

• Taking charge of conversation, attempts to distract you.

• Continual denying of accusations.

• Unusual voice fluctuations, word choice, sentence structure.

• Stalling the conversation by repetitive use of pauses and comments like "um" or "you know."

• Lack of use of contractions.

• Prefers emphasizing "not" when talking.

• Being extremely defensive.

• Saying "Trust me."

2. How they behave or the attitudes they exhibit:

• Being hesitant.

• Nervous laughter.

• Smugness.

• Uncommon calmness.

• Providing more information and specifics than is necessary or was asked for.

• Inconsistencies in what is being shared.

3. In-person behavior clues:

• Touching chin, covering the mouth, or rubbing brows.

• Crossed arms or legs.

• Pupils narrow.

• Playing with hair.

• Body language and facial expressions don't match what is being said such as saying "no", but nodding head up and down.

• Avoidance of eye contact, eyes glancing to the right, staring past you or down, or turning away from you while they are talking.

• Rigid or fidgeting.

• Slouching posture.

• Unnatural or limited arm and hand movements.

• Partial shrug.

• Lack of finger pointing.

• May place a barrier such as a desk or chair in front of self.

• Sweating, even if it isn't a warm day.

• Saying "no" several times.

4. Your own inner cues:

• You sense something is not right.

• Explanations do not feel enough for you.

• You feel confused, you find yourself squinting or angling your head.

• You feel a block or a wall between you and the other.

In Internet dating, or any kind of dating for that matter, keep your anxiety down, your head attached, and LISTEN to everything your date tells you in every way. People tell you about themselves constantly, from the very first second of contact. You have to be willing to hear it. Not only do they tell you by what they do say, they tell you by what they don't say.

Many of these cues can come from simple distraction or nervousness, not deceit. New daters have plenty of reasons to be anxious. Signs of lying differ from one person to another. Don't let your own nervousness force a jump to wrong conclusions. Give your date a break and take some time.

Often, Cyber daters move too quickly to the phone and/or a face to face meeting. Gone is the golden opportunity to safely ask questions and study answers slowly and over time. Vastly increased are tension and anxiety, which complicate clear thinking and judgment.

With online dating, you have a tremendous advantage over meeting immediately flesh-to-flesh: You have a written record of what the other tells you. Make use of it! Take your time and get to know your potential Sweetheart the old-fashioned way -- through writing!

About The Author

Kathryn Lord, Romance Coach
Helping singles find someone wonderful!
eBk: "Find A Sweetheart Soon! Your Love Trip Planner for Women"
4870 Oak Ridge Road, Vicksburg, MS 39183 / Ph. 601-619-0030
Stay current with my complimentary enewsletter *eMAIL to eMATE*

Subscribe at http://find-a-sweetheart.com/newsletter.html

http://www.Find-A-Sweetheart.com / Kathryn@Find-A-Sweetheart.com

Creating a Great Online Dating Profile

By Jan Andersen

First impressions are important, which is why it is essential to create an appealing, but honest profile of yourself. After all, this is the only information that a potential suitor has to go on initially and the decision on whether or not to contact you will be based upon what he or she reads in your profile. A great photo alone is not enough. After all, would you really want someone to choose you based purely on the way that you look rather than the person you are?

If you are not submitting a photo, then it is even more important to give a good description of yourself, your interests and your dislikes, along with information about the type of person you are seeking. A great profile will improve your chances of linking up with someone compatible and someone who is genuinely interested in you as a person.

There are no benefits in embellishing facts or lying, since the truth will emerge once you meet somebody. If they discover that you have distorted the truth, then trust will be lost, along with a potentially great relationship. You want somebody to choose you, because of who you are and not because you appear to live up to someone else�s fantasy.

Allow your personality to shine through. If you have a talent for wit and a great sense of humour, then incorporate these qualities into your profile. Be totally honesty about whom you are seeking, even down to including traits that you wouldn�t like in a potential partner and what you are hoping to gain from a future relationship. Conclude on an inviting note.

Don�t, of course, include too many personal details, such as your home address, telephone number, social establishments you frequent, vital statistics or bodily flaws, unless you want some weirdo with a penchant for bunions or three nipples to turn up drooling on your doorstep.

Choosing a Photo to Accompany Your Profile

Do include a recent, but flattering photo of yourself, not one that was taken 10 years ago when you were a different size/had a different hair colour/had more hair/less wrinkles/were going through your Gothic phase and which looks nothing like you do now. It may seem shallow, but those who include a photograph generally generate more interest than those who only submit a written profile.

Choose a clear photo in which you are smiling and appear approachable, rather than one taken when you were having a particularly bad day and which would probably deter anyone from wanting to contact you.

Double-Checking Your Profile

It is important to always double-check your spelling, punctuation and grammar before submitting your profile. Whilst most dating sites will provide the option of being able to edit your profile, it saves time in the long run by getting it right first time. I would always advise creating and saving your profile in Word or Notepad, so that if the pc decides to kick you out of the system for any reason whilst you are in the middle of inputting your profile, it will not be lost. It also means that if you join more than one dating site, you can simply cut and paste the profile into the relevant boxes on the site.

Online dating has revolutionised the matchmaking process, so why not make it work for you by portraying yourself in the best possible light and attracting Mr or Mrs Right into your life?

Recommended dating sites:

http://www.datinghappy.com

http://www.lovecatcher.com

About The Author

You have permission to publish this article free of charge, as long as the author bio and active link are included.

Jan Andersen is a British Freelance Writer and Copywriter specialising in articles and features on diverse lifestyle topics and social issues. She has also participated in many TV and radio programmes. Jan also owns and runs five websites; World Writer, Mothers Over 40, Child Suicide, SACS (Surviving After Child Suicide) and Jan Andersen Writing Services. Until recently, Jan had four children aged 20, 18, 17 and 4. Her eldest son, Kristian, tragically took his own life on 1 November 2002. Whilst campaigning for depression, suicide and drugs� awareness, Jan is writing a book on child suicide entitled, �Chasing Death�.

http://www.janandersen.homestead.com

worldwriteruk@hotmail.com

Online Dating. Is It Taken To Seriously?

By Tyler Casselman

When I look at alot of the online dating services I notice one common trend. People take it very seriously into finding there true love. I find it absolutely amazing the amount of people who are looking for there absolute perfect match.

There seems to be so many profiles out there who tell people exactly what it is they want from a partner. Its as if there an owner of a company and there trying to fill a certain job position. They then take and list there requirements and what they expect from a person. If they don't meet those requirements then they think there unsuitable. I think that's crazy.

Dating is about getting to know people and then seeing if you enjoy spending time with them. You will often meet people who you thought you would never date and end up having a strong relationship with them. I'm not saying that it isn't good to have certain expectations. It is good to have an idea of what you want in a partner. I'm just saying you need to have an open mind.

So what should you put in your profile?

Intsead of a whole big list of stuff like this is what I want and this is what I expect, you should have a touch of personality. Sure you will have certain expectations. You need to personalize them, so they just don't sound like your looking for a perfect person. If you like to joke around then add some little funnies throughout your profile. You need to show off your personality. Show people how you see the world and that you don't take everything so seriously.

When you go to a nightclub you don't just go to meet someone, you go to have some fun too. You need to look at online dating in the same way. Have some fun with it and don't take it to seriously. You will make things much easier on yourself.

About The Author

Tyler Casselman is an online dating expert. He owns the popular site Online Dating Home.

http://www.online-dating-home.com

In order to use this article on your site you must provide an active link back to Online Dating Home.

tyler@online-dating-home.com

Top Ten Ways to Set Appropriate Expectations for Dating

By Jane Johnson

1) Give yourself time to get back into the groove of dating

If you haven�t dated in a while it may require an investment of time and effort on your part if you are ultimately looking for a soul-mate. As we get older and learn from our experiences our requirements for an ideal mate may change and some things that were must haves may become negotiable. Getting dating experience helps with clarity around what is and is not negotiable in a mate. Detach from how long you think it ought to take to find your soul-mate.

2) Develop a �catch and release� program which supports your quest for an ideal mate.

Remember if you�re dating someone you really enjoy AND deep down know they are not �the one� � by keeping this person in your life hoping they will magically become �the one� � it keeps them and YOU from being open for the real �one�. Don�t be afraid to adopt a catch and release program if it�s not perfect, for you. Just maybe your ideal mate is waiting for you to become available!

3) Be irresistibly YOU!

At the end of the day � when people fall in love � it�s because they feel they know the �real you�. Why wait until later to reveal who that person is � start being YOU in every moment. Others may just find you irresistibly attractive!

4) Say�I�m curious�

The best way to get to know someone is to be curious about life through their eyes. We can never have the same experiences because we view life through our own filters and our own conditioning. So be curious � find out what makes the other person light up! What they are passionate about!

5) Who says dating can�t be fun?!

Have FUN!!! Adopt an expectation of fun. When you are having fun the best of you is coming out to play. Isn�t that a great way to enjoy yourself and time with others? What a wonderful gift to share with another human being � you being your best and most fun?! Your future happiness depends on it!

6) Tell me more�

Ask questions and be a good listener. Get to know the real person you are sitting across from. Being drilled with �interview� questions is not a good relating technique! Being interviewed on a date creates a hostile environment and puts the other person on the defensive. Relax and remember have fun and enjoy hearing about life from another perspective. Listen for cues when the other person speaks for a good next question. Let the conversation flow.

7) Rescue ME!

Don�t expect your date or your soul-mate to rescue you from your life. Entering into a healthy relationship means both parties come together as whole human beings and together you become even more amazing. If you are needy you may attract exactly what you don�t want and repel what you do want.

8) It all makes sense!

Each of us has our own unique life purpose. Remembering that gives, having judgment or controlling others, quite a different perspective. Having others do things your way may not always help them with their own life lessons or you with yours!

9) Neeeeeext?!

Be accepting of others. This does not mean that every person is a right match for you nor does it mean inappropriate behaviors are overlooked. It means you have a choice of whether to see this person again or not. Listen to your own intuition.

10) What�s the big rush�this is your life we�re talking about!

Take your time getting to know this new person in your life. Resist the urge to marry your date, in your mind, on the first (second, third�?) date. Engaging your emotions before you have enough information will hinder your ability to notice relationship red flags.

About The Author

This piece was originally submitted by Jane Johnson, a certified life coach who has experienced the world of internet dating. After a nearly 20 year hiatus from dating, she immersed herself in the activity. The following are tips from her observations, interviews and personal experiences. You can reach her at http://www.doingcoolstuff.com

Online Dating - Needle in a Haystack?

By Claire Gaskin

No doubt about it, Internet dating has become a unique part of modern love. In fact, in New York, Internet dating has become so popular that it is now simply called �partner shopping� or �hyper dating�.

Online personal ads were one of the first niche markets on the web at the beginning of the net revolution and statistics now predict that 50% of single people will hook up with a partner online. However, with thousands of dating websites to choose from around the world, finding the right one can be difficult.

If you�ve ever joined a general dating site you�ll know that trawling through a stream of profiles, with reams of personal information about housekeeping habits and suchlike, doesn�t mean that you will actually get along with someone. But the good news is that online dating is evolving, with recent trends showing a move towards specialist dating sites that aim to bring people with similar interests together.

Sometimes linked to lifestyles, such as dating sites for bikers, interest-based dating sites are leading the way for a new generation of people looking for love on the worldwide web. With literally millions of people using the internet as a new social arena in which to make new friends and find a partner, people are discovering that there is a much better chance of making that all important connection through a specialist site where the members have shared interests.

A recent survey by music-mate.com revealed that 80% of its members preferred interest-based dating sites, stating that they found it easier to make the first contact.

Music-mate.com creator Diane Ainslie understands this new trend: �I�ve used the internet in the past to find a date and I really liked the idea of being able to meet up with people without all the usual fuss. But I often found I didn�t have a lot in common with the people I met. As a huge music fan, I realised that meeting people who shared a passion for the same music as me was a great basis to develop new relationships. You have something to talk about straight away!�

And there�s the key. Joining a general dating site can be like visiting a strange city without a map. How do you even begin to find your way around? In choosing an interest-based site you�re starting on familiar ground. It�s easier to get talking and you�re more likely to meet someone you have something in common with. If half of all single people are using the Internet to find a partner, finding that special someone is like finding a needle in a haystack. It might just be time to jump on the latest bandwagon and find a dating site that interests you!

Author: Claire Gaskin is a social researcher and co-founder of music-mate.com

http://www.music-mate.com

10 Things Never to Say to a Guy

By Lucia Demasi

1. When will I see you again? You'll see him when you see him. If he wants to see you again, he'll call. If not, next. You don't have time for anyone that doesn't have time for you.

2. Why didn't you call? There's only one answer to this question: Because he didn't want to!!! What you're really asking is, "Why didn't you want to call me?" Who knows!! There could be a lot of reasons, but you shouldn't be sitting around wondering why. You should be out dating lots of different guys and not worrying about ONE guy. Don't be so quick to put all your eggs into one basket, because if they break, it's a big mess!

3. Where were you? If he wanted you to know where he was, he'd tell you. What you're really asking is, "Where you with another female that you like better than me?" Your insecurity is showing, sweetie. If anything, he should be wondering where you were.

4. I love you. You're saying it in the hopes that he'll say it back, but what if he doesn't? You'll be devastated and probably feel foolish. Saying "I love you" is not going to speed things up if he's not ready to say it back. So just cool it, and let him be the first to say it when he's ready.

5. Did you sleep with her? As long as he's not sleeping with her now, who cares? The past is gone. Don't torture yourself (and him) with these thoughts. In this case, ignorance really is bliss.

6. Are you seeing anyone else? Mystery is to men what romance is to women. You've just indirectly told him that you want to be exclusive, you've handed over control of the relationship and you've killed the mystery. Who knew 5 words could be so powerful?

7. Where is this going? Nowhere fast if that's your attitude. Guys want someone fun and easy to be with, not someone that's constantly worrying about the future. His actions or non-actions will tell you where it's going. If it's going somewhere, you'll know it. If it's not, you'll know it too.

8. We need to talk. This is the equivalent of, "Go to the principal's office". Guys know it's not going to be a fun conversation, so they're already on the defense. If you need to discuss something, just casually bring it up when the both of you are relaxed. Don't try to talk to him when he's tired, stressed or trying to watch tv!

9. What are you thinking? What you're really asking is: Is something wrong? Are you mad at me? Are you thinking about our relationship? Are you thinking about me? Are you thinking about someone else? If he wants you to know what he's thinking, he'll tell you on his own. If he doesn't, he'll lie when you ask.

10. I don't trust you. What you're actually saying is, "You need to step up your game, because I can see you're up to something." If he is up to something, he'll just become even sneakier. Better to think smart and act dumb-it'll be easier to get the evidence you need to confirm your suspicions.

Lucia is a dating and relationship expert, columnist, lecturer, author of "Lucia's Lessons of Love" and host of the TV Show "The Art of Love". She's appeared on The Tyra Banks Show, E! Entertainment, The KTLA Morning Show and numerous radio shows across the U.S.A., including Playboy Radio.

With over 20 years experience on the relationship market, Lucia has dated men of all nationalities in six cities, four countries and two continents. Her practical know-how makes her the perfect candidate to dispense relationship advice - after all, in almost every dating dilemma she has been there, done that and lived to tell about it.

For more information go to: http://www.lessonsoflove.net

The Best First Date

By Yair Czitrom

First dates cause anxiety and thoughts of disastrous and embarrassing moments. We all dread the awkward but necessary first date. It comes with the territory when looking for love. But it isn�t necessary to feel this way. You can have the best first date experience with every new person you go out with from now on. Here are a few tips on how you can actually enjoy yourself and possibly make yourself even more attractive on each first date.

Don�t bring your expectations or baggage with you. The last thing your date wants to hear about are your past relationships, ex�s and the problems you had with other people. You not only sound like a whiner who can�t let go, but you also make yourself sound critical. If you also list what you think a relationship or person should have been, you are setting the other person up for failure because you are obviously judgmental. Your past is your past and it should stay there. You are with a person who has many aspects of their personality you can spend countless hours exploring. Look at it as an adventure instead of like a job application. Enjoy each new thing you learn about the person even if you know you don�t want to see them again. You never know what you will learn or if you have found a new friend.

When you leave to meet your date, remind yourself that you are your own person and this is a great opportunity for someone to get to know who you are. You are a person with dreams, ideas and intelligent thoughts that can share so much with the right person. Walk into your date comfortable in your own skin. Maintain your happy composure and keep the conversation light but honest.

Don�t talk about yourself in any negative terms. If you point out what you consider to be your shortcomings and flaws, they will be seen. They might have only been visible to you before you called attention to them. You will also be obvious in your insecurities and this can make other people feel uncomfortable. This is not a feeling you want someone you are interested in to associate with you.

While it is absolutely acceptable to participate in conversation, remember to be just as good a listener. It means so much to people when they feel as if they have someone�s undivided attention and they are important enough to have your focus. When making a comment on a topic or answering a question, you are letting them know you find them interesting and worth the time and thought. This courtesy is not always noticed on the surface, but when they think back on the date, they will feel as if you truly cared about who they are and what they have to say.

Finally, show them that you have a sense of humor and have fun. Laughter and humor is attractive on its own and can only help ease the tension of a stressful meeting situation. While you might not meet �the one� on your next first date, you will know you gave it your all and the next one won�t be so bad.

www.jaters.com - Free Jewish dating, Jewish singles & Jewish matchmaking service

Yair Czitrom is the owner and webmaster of http://www.jaters.com - An experienced online dater that took his dating knowledge and web skills to help other daters/singles.

Looking To Join A Dating Site?

By William Hanes

Searching the web for a dating or personals site can leave one very confused. There are millions of dating sites listed on the Internet. My search of the word "dating" on Google resulted in 56,200,000 results! Talk about a tough decision.

Let me give you some pointers and advice.

Currently, I am a Webmaster of a few dating sites as well as dating referral sites. I have seen all the styles of personal sites. They all follow pretty much the same format with a few variations. Sure, there are some great free dating sites, as well as some terrible ones. The same holds true for pay dating sites. Now, as a Webmaster, let me assure you of one thing, all us webmasters are promoting dating sites for one thing...money.

Now, don�t get me wrong, but I could put up a decent free dating site, and allow members to join my dating site for free. I would just post some ads or banners, and offer to sell something, which might be of interest. Then, hopefully, I would generate enough revenue off these sales to support the site. Kind of a traffic generator.

My advice is this... If your looking to join a dating or personals site, before you even start looking, ask yourself, what am I looking for. Narrow the search down somewhat. Are you looking for a lesbian site, how about a military dating site? Maybe a "dog-lovers" dating site. Trust me, there all out there. Now, let the search begin. Try Google, Yahoo or whatever you prefer. My suggestion is that you look for personal sites that offer what I call a semi-free membership. A semi-free membership is where you are allowed to post your profile. (This is where you tell about yourself and post some pics) On this type of dating site, you are not allowed to contact other members, It's kind of like fishing, you put out the bait and see if anything bites. This type of dating site could work well if you�re not in a rush. Now, the wait is on...

Remember though; beware of some of the replies you receive. Most will be good matches of what you are looking for though. Be cautious of the soon to be admirer who needs you to send cash so that he may come see you though, this happens occasionally, but not often. I'll say it once, don't send anyone money! Don't get in a panic and think everyone�s a scammer, most are not. Now, if your not ready to wait for replies, you will need to pay up to send messages to other users on this type of site. Remember this too though, if you want a shy gal (personally I like them), there not as quick to send me a message if they see my ad. Remember, they might be shy or feel that they are not what your looking for. So, joining might be a good idea.

I would like to offer some quick pointers on what to do before even signing up for a free dating membership though. Do a Whois search on the site you are considering joining. To do a whois just do a Yahoo search on "whois" and follow the directions. If you typed in my domain name www.thatdatingsite.com you can find out for sure, who I am. Sure, I could lie when I set up the domain, but my phone numbers there too, just call me. See how most webmasters have nothing to hide while some do. Some whois search results will contain "hidden" information. Do you really want to join this type of dating site?

Another pointer, if the site loads slowly, has popups or spam, beware. Remember the rule above? All us webmasters are in it for the money. If you join this type of dating site, get your spam blockers and virus protectors tuned up.

See, if I can give you popups, there are people who will pay me just to show you popups. They'll pay even more for your email address... Now, see why this is important. Just be cautious and have fun, there�s a lot of high quality dating sites out there. Most are reputable, but unfortunately, there are a few bad ones.

Good luck in your search for your soul mate or whatever you are looking for. I wish you luck!

Bud Hanes is the webmaster at http://www.thatdatingsite.com. He encourages all to enjoy internet dating while practicing safe methods.

Online Dating

By Yair Czitrom

Dating has become easier for everyone due to the emergence and success of online dating websites. You can choose the site that suits you best, look for people who have the features you desire along with common interests and contact them immediately. Some dating sites are featuring their own instant messaging for members to instantly communicate with each other. This is a great way to make contact and get excited about a new �date�. But when you start chatting back and forth, the other person is typing recognizable words along with small clusters of letters here and there. What are they saying? These are considered to be �Net Lingo� and are commonly used Internet acronyms.

411 � Information
AFK - Away from keyboard
AISI - As I see it
AMBW � All my best wishes
ATST � At the same time
B4 � Before
B4N � Bye for now
BBIAF � Be back in a few
BBL � Be back later
BBN � Bye-bye now
BS � Big Smile
BTW � By the way
CID � Consider it done
CSL � Can�t stop laughing
CWYL - Chat with you later
DGT � Don�t go there
DHYB � Don�t hold your breath
DKDC � Don�t know, don�t care
EG � Evil Grin
EOM � End of message
FOAF - Friend of a friend
FTTB � For the time being
FWIW � For what it�s worth
FYI � For your information
GAL � Get a life
GL � Good Luck
GR8 � Great
GTG - Got to go
GTSY � Glad to see ya
HAGO � Have a good one
HAK � Hugs and Kisses
HB � Hurry Back
HHOK � Ha, ha only kidding
HTH � Hope this helps
IAE � In any event
IDKY � I don�t know you
ILY � I love you
IMO � In my opinion
IRL � In real life
IYSS � If you say so
J/W � Just wondering
KIT � Keep in touch
KWIM � Know what I mean
LD � Long distance
LMK � Let me know
LOL � Laughing out loud
LTIC � Laughing �til I cry
LTNS � Long time no see
LYL � Love ya lots
M8 � Mate
MRS � Meet real soon
MWBRL � More will be revealed later
MYOB � Mind your own business
NBD � No big deal
NOYB � None of your business
NP � No problem
OIC � Oh I see
ONNA � Oh no, not again
OOC � Out of Character
OT � Off topic
OTOH � On the other hand
POV � Point of view
RBTL � Read between the lines
RN � Right now
SF � Super friendly
SNAG � Sensitive new age guy
STYS � Speak to you soon
SWDYT � So what do you think
TAH � Take a hike
TIAIL � Think I am in love
TIC � Tongue in cheek
TM � Trust me
TMI � Too much information
TTYL � Talk to you later
TYVM � Thank you very much
VM � Voice mail
WE � Whatever
WG � Wicked grin
WYRN � What�s your real name
WYSIWYG � What you see is what you get
YAFI � You asked for it
YDKM � You don�t know me
YNK � You never know

Enjoy :-)

Yaya is the owner of http://www.jaters.com - a free jewish dating site and an experienced dater.

Online Dating - Confidence Builder

By Steve Eyes

Most of us have different levels of confidence. I�m sure you have met a variety of confident types. I�m just as sure, that all of us have had our own confidence shaken once or twice. I know I have.

In relationships most of us have different degrees of confidence. There were times I felt like I could do no wrong and other times I couldn�t do anything right. The ups and downs of relationships are still a mystery to me. I don�t have all the answers, but most of us have in common some the same feelings: the hope when you see someone you can�t take your eyes off of; the anticipation of being on a first date; the moment when you kiss; the bliss of love; and also: the slap when someone says no; the hopelessness when someone walks away, the emptiness when someone you love cheats on you and so on. We all have been their.

What happens when the worse has happen to you. I can give you a glimpse of the male�s perspective. You are in love. She is everything you could want. She�s beautiful, sexy, and makes you feel alive. You can�t wait to be with her or near her. You are on top of the world and life couldn�t be better. Then she walks away. No amount of begging will bring her back. The signs of her leaving were probably there, but you were too in love to see them. You cry, you drink, cry some more and the emptiness won�t go away. You are lost.

Then there is the guy who drinks a case a beer, cries for a night, says the hell with it then parties the next night. This over exuberant soul creates such a whirlwind he leaves himself no time to grieve or to contemplate his state of loss. When he crashes, his recovery is usually a tough road.

For me, the old adage that time heals, had value. I had no desire to go clubbing. I was lonely, still grieving and didn�t have the confidence to get back in to the dating world again. As time went on, I found a comfortable, yet boring routine. I wanted to date again, but the thought of it would give me flash backs of unpleasant moments. Sigh, loneliness was becoming my friend.

Online dating was something I heard about and decided to check it out. I was tired of watching reruns on tv. It didn�t take long to search out the many dating sites available on the net. I searched, researched, and joined. I was slowly and comfortably getting involved again. I could sit at home in my sweats, converse with ladies online, and not have to face a crowd in a smoky bar room if a lady said �no�. Yet, the no�s were rare online. This was not a face to face ritual, but me on my keyboard and her on her keyboard that gave us both the needed space to get acquainted. It was fun, relaxing and a confidence booster. Yes, I�ll say it again, a confidence booster.

How can online dating boost your confidence versus traditional dating? It has to do with vulnerability. Think about it. If you just lost your confidence, would you rather face a lady in a crowd of others, or at home while using MSN chat or email. After a huge letdown, most of us struggle with the thought of going out in the harsh dating world were appearance is premium versus the power of words and feelings you converse online. Whatever your state of mind may be at that moment, you can find another person online feeling as you do. That's hard to find in a smoky bar room under the influence of alcohol.

Eventually my confidence did return to an adequate level to venture out to the dance clubs. I had online dating to thank for that. For a while, I was playing in both worlds and saw some stark difference in what was real and what was not. Both have their pitfalls, but eventually I realized that the typical dating world had many more masks and traps that was not present in the online world. That�s another article. For now, I just want to say if you have lost your confidence because of a relationship disaster, give your self time to heal and see if you can find yourself again by joining a good online dating site. I guarantee you will find your confidence again and if you are lucky, like me, you will find the love of your love.

About The Author

Steve Eyes is a webmaster for FilipinaEyes Association and gains his insight from his online dating experience and helping others find love on one of his online dating web sites.

http://www.filipinaeyes.com

http://www.filipinalady.biz

http://www.filipina-lady.org

http://www.filipina-lady.net

The Huge Advantages of Online Dating

By Jan Andersen

Imagine the joy of finding the love of your life, an exciting romantic liaison or a rewarding friendship when you are looking and feeling your worst. You had a hellish time at work the previous day, you feel as though you haven�t slept a wink, your skin would be a voyage of exploration for a dermatologist and a crow would be more than happy nesting in your hair. You feel tired and fed up and your self-esteem is at an all time low. You long for someone special with whom to share your life, but right now you feel that even Quasimodo wouldn�t consider you as a romantic option. In this moment of self-deprecation, how is meeting Mr or Mrs Right possible? By taking advantage of online dating, of course.

Helen is 38 and works for a prestigious law firm. Her dating track record since the tragic and premature death of her husband five years ago has been poor. Although the majority of Helen�s work colleagues are male, she says, �The majority of them are married and even if they were available, I would not be interested. I also don�t think I could cope with having a relationship with someone involved in the legal sector. I imagine that we would find it very hard to leave our work behind. Socially, where does one go to meet likeminded men who are genuinely interested in a relationship as opposed to a one-night stand?�

Helen went onto explain that she met her late husband whilst at university and, during the many contented years of her marriage, she had a fairly blinkered view of dating agencies. �I viewed them with suspicion, assuming that they were frequented by people who either had major personality flaws, or else had some ulterior seedy motive. I never once stopped to think about how difficult it is in this day and age to meet suitable companions in mainstream environments. Of course, about two years after Harry�s death when I began thinking that I didn�t want to spend the rest of my life alone, I realised that meeting other people was not that easy. Clubs and pubs really didn�t appeal to me. I tried going with friends to wine bars, but found that I was largely on the receiving end of unwanted attention from men in whom I had no interest. It was also obvious that the majority of them were just after a quick thrill.

Helen quickly began to view dating agencies as an attractive option, but didn�t really like the idea of being computer-matched with someone. After all, that removed personal choice and she made it clear that she was not the sort of person who liked having choices made for her! Her decision to try online dating as an alternative was made whilst awaiting a dental appointment.

�In the waiting room, I came across an article on online dating as I was idly perusing the obligatory stack of well-thumbed women�s magazines. The article must have been particularly well written, because I was instantly sold on the idea. The concept of being able to peruse a database of potential suitors whilst still in my dressing gown was extremely appealing. At least I knew that when I did dress up, it would be because I actually had a date, rather than putting a huge effort into preparing for a night cruising around social clubs, with no guarantee that I was going to meet someone. After my appointment, I couldn�t wait to get home and begin checking out some of the sites that were recommended.

Helen spent a long time researching the plethora of online dating sites before she found one that she felt catered for her needs, which of course included a level of security.

�I wasn�t particularly drawn to totally free sites, because I felt that they were more likely to attract members who weren�t particularly serious about the process, or whose intentions weren�t entirely honourable. I was more interested in sites that allowed you to peruse profiles, but which required you to pay for full membership before allowing you to contact other members. That way, I knew that those I contacted were probably more serious about meeting someone special and not just after a quick fling. I wanted to sign up with a site where I felt totally in control and also secure in the knowledge that none of my personal contact details would be divulged to anyone unless I specifically chose to give out this information. I was also more impressed by sites that offered a range of relationship advice and articles.�

Helen eventually signed up with www.DatingHappy.com and says that it was one of the best decisions she has ever made.

�At first I felt rather embarrassed admitting to even my closest friends that I had chosen this route, but when I did, I was amazed at how many of them had also considered doing the same thing. One of my friends, whom I assumed had met her husband at the gym, admitted that she had actually met him via an online message forum. Although this wasn�t the same as a dating agency, essentially it was no different. She had found someone with whom she shared common interests, but whom she had not previously met face-to-face and that is exactly how I began broadening my male social circle, except via a dedicated relationship facility.

Helen says that she found the search process �exhilarating�.

�It was like being an invisible fly on the wall in a room full of interesting men from all walks of life with their personal profiles attached to them I could look, analyse and weigh up the options in a way that would be impossible if all those men were in one room. The best part was the convenience and the fact that it didn�t matter one iota what I looked like or how I behaved!

�I also liked the idea of initially being able to build the foundations of a relationship on friendship and mutual interests, before actually meeting someone and being blinded by lust, which of course never lasts with the same intensity as at the beginning of a relationship!�

Has Helen met her match?

�Very possibly�, she laughs. �I�ve had tremendous fun and I�d like to say that I believe I have found a relationship with future potential, but you�ll just have to wait and see......!!�

About The Author

Jan Andersen is a British Freelance Writer and Copywriter specialising in articles and features on diverse lifestyle topics and social issues. She has also participated in many TV and radio programmes. Jan also owns and runs five websites; World Writer, Mothers Over 40, Child Suicide, SACS (Surviving After Child Suicide) and Jan Andersen Writing Services. Until recently, Jan had four children aged 20, 18, 16 and 4. Her eldest son, Kristian, tragically took his own life on 1 November 2002. Whilst campaigning for depression, suicide and drugs� awareness, Jan is writing a book on child suicide entitled, �Chasing Death�.

http://www.janandersen.homestead.com

Dating Advice: Common Interest Results in Happy Marriages

By Terry Hernon MacDonald

How often do your married friends complain about husbands who spend weekends on the couch watching games? Did they not notice these guys were sports fanatics while they were dating? Did they think things would change after the wedding?

Life is fraught with ups and downs, so it's critical to marry someone you can have fun with, today and fifty years from now. Here's how you can find that person:

1. Write down a list of the things you like to do. Then do them. I have a theory that if all the singles who claim to enjoy long walks on the beach actually took long walks on the beach, they'd meet, get married, and the personal ad industry would collapse.

If you like to read, hang out in a bookstore. If the bookstore has a cafe, become a regular there. If you like beer and bands, grab a friend and get to know the faces at a neighborhood bar (take a cab; no drinking and driving, please).

Do what you like to do.

This technique worked for a good friend of mine. After discovering that his longtime girlfriend had been cheating on him, he left her. Then he gave himself time to mourn and moved on.

He had two hobbies, cooking and hiking. He enrolled in a cooking class and joined a hiking club, in the hopes of widening his social circle. After the cooking class ended, he invited his classmates to a party at his house and encouraged them to bring friends. Guess who showed up? A fun, attractive (and faithful!) woman who enjoys entertaining and good food as much as he does. They've been married three years now.

2. Write down a list of things you'd like to do but haven't gotten around to yet. Would you like to build a bookcase? Check out the list of classes at your local Home Depot. Want to learn how to fix your transmission? Take an auto repair course. Women are bound to meet men there. If you're bent on improving your money management skills, take a finance course. You'll likely meet smart, upwardly mobile people.

The key to attracting a husband who you can have fun with 10, 25, and 50 years from now is to do the things that make you happy today.

Then see who shows up.

Terry Hernon MacDonald is the author of "How to Attract and Marry the Man of Your Dreams." Visit her website at http://www.marrysmart.com