The Five Worst Date Places

By Jason OConnor

Food in teeth, nausea, childhood stories and exposing your pot belly are all things you ought to avoid on first or second dates. You run the risk of experiencing these and other humiliating incidents if you choose the wrong place to bring your date. Good places are memorable, different, unique, cost-effective, and relevant to both of you in some way. Bad date places have none of these qualities and the worst places not only lack these things, but also embarrass you and assure that you�ll never get another date with the person again.

Let�s look at the function of a date. If you�re single, a date acts like an interview. Your goal is to get the other person to still like you enough when the date is over to go out with you again, assuming you�re still interested as well. You�re trying to appear cool, sexy, together, confident, and fun. You�re also trying to make the other person as comfortable as possible.

That�s why avoiding the worst places is the first step in smart dating. The following lists the worst places you could choose to go on a date and I recommend that you avoid them like the plague if you want the other person to still like you when it�s over.

An Amusement Park

As the roller coaster nears its pinnacle your date looks over the side and silently swears under her breath at you for talking her into going on this ride. She hates roller coasters, has always been afraid of them, and is highly susceptible to motion sickness. As she contemplates her strategy to avoid you in the future, the coaster starts its stomach-turning decent, and she leans over and throws up in your lap, her way of saying �Thanks for the great date�.

Amusement parks are a funky phenomenon. You�ll often find overgrown stuffed animals running around trying to high-five you, screaming children, long lines, and overpriced food. Unless your date is an amusement park buff, it�s unlikely he or she is going to love the idea.

*** The Beach ***

Don�t get me wrong, the beach is a great place. But from the point of view of a date with a near stranger, it stinks. First, there�s an awful lot of sand and it can get everywhere. You can�t easily eat on the beach; a lack of furniture contributes to that. With sand and bugs-o-plenty, eating ends up being a drag.

But probably the worst thing about the beach is that you�re compelled to take off most of your clothes. Now, if you both have hot bodies, well-groomed with flat stomachs and great muscle tone, then you have nothing to worry about. But if you don�t, stay away from places that make you feel silly if you want to keep all your imperfection-hiding clothes on.

*** A Non-Traditional Restaurant ***

One time I took a date to a Japanese restaurant where they made everyone take off their shoes upon entering. There were no chairs, just floor-level tables that everyone sat around on little pillows. It didn�t seem like it was going to be too bad until I started to smell my feet while eating our salads. The noxious odor must have been escaping from the various holes in my ratty socks. The whole night was humiliatingly awkward.

Other places to avoid are eateries where you�re expected to use your hands to feed yourself. A first date doesn�t want to watch you maul your barbeque ribs and chicken legs like The Missing Link. No one likes the thought of being touched later on by greasy fingers. And have you ever eaten corn on the cob and come away with clean teeth?

*** A Family Function ***

I don�t know about your family, but a few of my great-aunts have hairy faces. I mean really hairy, with partial beards and hairy moles. One of my uncles thinks he�s still living in 1880 and uses every racist expression ever known. So it goes without saying that I never brought dates to family functions. And you shouldn�t either. Weddings, reunions, baptisms, bat mitzvahs, and especially funerals, are out.

There�s no such thing as a family that isn�t dysfunctional. It doesn�t exist. If you bring a first or second date to a family function be prepared for somebody to embarrass you. Grandma will ask you two when you�re getting married and when to expect great grandchildren. And your little cousin Eunice will promptly tell your date all about the time you farted in church.

*** Your Parent�s House for Dinner ***

I can�t think of a more uncomfortable setting than sitting at a dinner table with complete strangers in their own house. Don�t put a date through this torture. You may have the hippest parents in the world. They may intelligent, hospitable and interesting. But don�t subject anyone you just recently met to your parents for an entire dinner.

Often the parent of your same sex looks like you�re going to look in twenty five years. You�ll find your date sizing up your parent asking themselves whether they�ll be ok with your pot belly and hairy ears a couple of decades from now.

Bringing your date to your parent�s house is just asking for trouble. Your mom may temporarily forget that you�re trying to make an impression and start talking to you like you�re thirteen years old again, �Before you leave tonight my little muffin, can you take your hemorrhoid ointment out of our medicine cabinet, daddy keeps using it for lip cream by mistake.�

Dates can be traumatic and nerve-racking in the best of places so don�t make it harder on either of you than you have to. There are some great places to take a date that will make you look like a hero, won�t cost you too much, will give you just enough time to talk to each other, but will also provide an entertaining distraction.

I�m talking about museums, jazz shows, rock concerts, musicals, art shows, plays and live comedy. These are all cool places to bring a first or second date. They allow you to talk and be entertained at the same time. These types of places make the date memorable, distinct and out of the ordinary. It shows you put more than just a little thought in the idea. And if you�re trying to get someone to go out with you for the first time, find out what kind of bands, shows, comedians or plays they like, buy a couple of tickets, and casually invite them along with an explanation like your buddy just cancelled on you and you have a free ticket that you don�t want to waste.

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Jason OConnor ฉ2004

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Finding a Safe Dating Site

By Leif Croonquist

Seems like everywhere we surf on the Internet nowadays we run across this little advertisement: 'Free online personals'.
They are everywhere, they are dating sites, and more are opening up shop every day.

Welcome to the newest internet gold rush.
More and more people are signing up to these new and "free" dating sites.
What they are really getting is a place on the web where they can post their profile and let strangers contact them.
As more and more dating sites pile up on the web, more people are ending up with very distasteful experiences because of this.
Why? 99% of today's (and tomorrow's) dating sites do not screen their members at all. This means there are sex offenders, predators, scam artists
mixed in with genuine people who are looking to find a match.
Dating services need to be very discretionary and much safer, until that time comes here are some important things to consider
when thinking about joining a dating site.

1). Examine the site's physical properties. Is it poorly constructed with missing graphics or jagged fonts, mis-aligned sections? If so, this indicates a lack of attention to detail in the construction and layout of the site. It may have been pre purchased and the owner does not have the skill to alter it correctly. Why would you care? Well, a site in a state like this gives a clue that the back end program probably is also in a state of disarray or disregard. If the webmaster cannot construct the face of the site, then it is likely they cannot also construct important safety features behind the site. A hacker then could easily penetrate it and get your personal information including your photo. If you eventually pay this site, your credit information could be stolen as well! A nicely designed site means careful construction and a better chance of good quality code running the site in the background.

2). Look at some sample profiles on the site before you sign up by running a quick search. Do the profiles look a little bogus? A lot of them are. Many sites (especially new ones that have just started up) pad their membership database with photos of models or random (usually good-looking people) to attract new members. Do the profiles have a lot of jibberish characters or nonsensical phrases in the descriptions? That means the dating site you are at does NOT screen the people who sign up. This welcomes people with ill-intent. You should get out of there immediately and go to one that does.

3). Does the site have a privacy link? Look at the bottom of the site's main page. If they have a privacy link, click it and examine. Make sure they specifically state that they do NOT sell your information to anyone. This is an invitation to a spam and junk-mail nightmare. Also look for some sort of a web site rules page or a terms of use page. Check to see if they screen their profiles or somehow >disallow racial, hate or overly sexual material. If they don't state this than, anything goes for this site, another reason to leave.

4). Does the site have a links page? If so click and examine. See who they are affiliated with. Usually, there will be graphical banners or icons next to the names of their associations. Are they sex-sites? Spam sites? Even a quick glance in this area could tell you what kind of a dating site you are at.

5). What is the copyright date at the bottom? This could indicate the age of the site. If it is very young, this could help you determine if the site has worked out all the kinks (program bugs) and how many members they have accumulated.

6). Be wary of statements like "You are the 4697th member to join today." and "Search through millions of profiles." these statements are usually false. Major sites, which have been running for YEARS usually can support these statements. look for a "whos online" link. If you are the only person (1 guest online means JUST you are there) then you know these claims are false. A site with millions or even thousands of members will always have a bunch of people currently online. If you detect this in a dating site, it is better to leave than to take a chance with a dishonest site. This is just a short list of ideas to help keep you safe when dating online. Be leary, be safe. More information can be found at Personals 4 Dating

Leif Croonquist is a 34 year old writer from Portland, Oregon. He is a member of Personals 4 Dating

Have You Lost That Loving Feeling?

By Janett Colon

How To Choose a Dating Service

By Sara Blackmoore

Online Dating 101 - Online Dating Basics

By Kevin Koger

Online Dating 101 by Kevin Koger

Feeling like there�s something that�s just not quite there yet in how you�re going about this whole online dating thing? Don�t feel bad, chances are you�re one of the many people who�re still pretty new to this gig. Heck, internet dating has only been around for about eight years, so obviously no one out there can claim to have all the answers.

But hey, seeing that we've been perfecting the art of matching people up online all eight of those years, we�d like to share a little of what we�ve learned about how to make the best of your online experience. Who knows, one of these pointers might be just what you�ve been missing in perfecting your own online dating adventures.

Therefore, without further ramblings, here are the:

TOP 10 TIPS FOR SUCCESSFUL ONLINE DATING

SAY CHEESE! Look your best and submit a great photo of yourself for your profile photo. A good picture really is worth a thousand words, and research shows that you are nearly 10 times more likely to be noticed if you post a photo to your profile.

And, the same stats hold true when you contact someone you�ve noticed on the site. If you don�t have a photo, don�t be surprised if the responses aren�t too quick in coming back.

Now, don�t get mad a start making accusations about all the shallow people out there. While it may be true that some people place too much emphasis on physical appearances, the bottom line is it does make a difference when two people are meeting and making initial evaluations of their interest in each other. And, it�s also a trust thing. It is always going to be much easier to interact with a face than with a blank box.

FRESH IS GOOD Change your profile picture and greeting occasionally, add photos to your photo album, and login regularly�this will not only get you noticed, but it will help others get a more varied and up-to-date idea of what constitutes the real you.

When something interesting happens in your life, tell us about it in your profile greeting. This is a great way to let your online friends in on what it might be like to actually spend time with you. That�s the main goal of online dating isn�t it, to find people you�d finally like to meet and spend time with face-to-face? Anyways, it�s always more fun to hear about a crazy experience you�ve just had than to read the same old descriptions of you and your cat that have been on your profile for months now.

As for photo albums, this is the icing on the cake. Not only do these photos round out and confirm the physical picture your friends are forming of you, but they also go a long way in helping others really see what makes you �you.� The head and shoulders shot of you in your profile photo is nice and all, but when they see you hanging 10, running with your Chihuahua, or shoving a big fat piece of cheesecake in your mouth � now they�re getting to know you.

I HAVE CONFIDENCE IN ME Have fun describing yourself without making excuses about why you're on the site or who convinced you to finally go online. Tell us what makes you unique.

Believe it or not, being an online dater no longer places you on the fringes of society or even in the minority. Online dating has grown up and moved into the mainstream, and so you can now happily assume that the face-saving qualifiers of past times online are now obsolete. And, more importantly, just realize that they don�t help your cause when meeting others online.

One more thing � try to be original. Yes, I�m sure you really do like the outdoors and want to meet someone who looks good in a tux and in jeans, but so does everyone else! Tell us some things about yourself that wouldn�t necessarily come out in an elevator conversation with your tax accountant. For example, what are you passionate about? What would you do if no longer had to work for a living? What�s your favorite flavor of gelato? Do you secretly wish everyday was sampling day at the grocery store? � now it� getting interesting!

HONESTY IS THE BEST POLICY Don't be fooled thinking telling fibs will impress that special someone enough to get relationship started... it will turn them off! Be your best self.

When you really stop and think about it, what do you think your new friend�s reaction is going to be if when you meet for the first time it�s obvious you�re not the person they thought they were going to be meeting? �Oh .. hi. I see that you�ve been dishonest with me from the get-go here, but hey, I�m still thinking we�ve got a great shot at having an open, trusting relationship for the long-term� Obviously not.

They�re going to be hurt, and disappointed. And, your relationship is unlikely to get past the wave goodbye as your friend gets back in their car to go home.

IT'S NICE TO BE NICE Okay, so you get a little grouchy once in a while�don�t we all? However, people like nice people. Please be considerate and polite � it will make this whole online thing so much more enjoyable for all of us!

There�s an interesting social phenomenon researchers have discovered in online interactions. They�ve found people often change their standards of politeness and diplomacy when a conversation is happening online, versus face-to-face.

Don�t believe it? You might be surprised if you were to go back and look at some of the things you�ve said. Look at some messages you�ve sent, and then consider saying the exact same words in a face-to-face or a telephone conversation. Sound a little rough? Don�t feel too bad, it happens to the best of us, just try to keep this in mind the next time you�re typing out an email or instant message.

One more thing�please don�t ignore people. A quick �thanks, but no thanks� note is so much better than no reply at all. In fact, next time you�re replying to a message on the site, check out the new �Thanks but No Thanks� template. It�s a quick way to nicely let someone know you�re not interested in corresponding.

YOU CAN PICK YOUR FRIENDS � Invite your friends along! Create Activity Groups, go on group dates, try Express Dating, enjoy travel events, and just enjoy the net together. After all, instant messaging alone isn�t enough to build solid relationships.

Group dating and group events simply make a lot of sense for online dating. Not only does it make those first dates less stressful, it often makes them more fun, and it definitely makes first meetings a much safer proposition.

Have you ever tried Activity Groups? They�re a great way to meet people with common interests in a safe, fun group setting. You can join a group that�s already been created, or you can create your own and invite all your friends to join � and their friends � and their friends � you get the point.

BREAK OUTA THAT SHELL Don�t be afraid to make the first contact. Online dating makes it easy for all you shy ones out there to break the ice, because you get to do all the initial getting to know each other from the comfort and safety of your own computer.

To start, just send a Flirt or a quick email message saying Hi�and do it often! You might be surprised how many of our great members suffer from lack of attention from their online peers. Not only might you find someone with whom you�re very interested in maintaining contact, but you�ll probably be making someone�s day.

EXPAND YOUR HORIZONS If your first internet efforts haven�t turned up �the perfect one,� don�t despair. Hundreds of new people sign up every day on the site, so just come back to see Who�s New. You may also want to consider expanding your searches�don�t be too intent on sticking to your itemized checklist for eternal mates.

You might also want to try some different searches from time to time. Because there are about a million different things you might find attractive in another person, it�s nice to mix up the criteria you�re searching on once in a while. For example, you can search by their Occupation, any Keyword or combination of keywords you can think of, and many others.

UH OH � THIS MIGHT ACTUALLY BE FUN! Don�t be afraid to have some fun along your path to relationship happiness! Enjoy getting to know people and understand that many happy relationships and even marriages start with a good ol� friendship. And, don�t rush it!

You�ve heard animals can sense fear? Well, we humans can be pretty perceptive as well (except for that one guy who just can�t take a hint). So, don�t think others can�t sense when you�re frustrated, dejected, conceited, holier than thou, fed up, etc. etc. Put a smile on, and enjoy the ride, because even if the first few people you meet aren�t Mr./Mrs. Right, it doesn�t mean you can�t have some fun in good conversations with them.

You may also need to be a little bit patient as you head off into the brave new world of online dating. Not all marriages are �love at first site,� and even if yours is, it may take a lot of looking before you �site� that special someone. And so, once again � enjoy the ride!

USE YOUR NOODLE Ya know, that gray matter between your ears? That's your noodle. Use it! Be smart, be cautious, and follow our safety guidelines, your instincts, and the spirit in all your dating activity.

Done right, online dating is a lot of fun, and it�s a great way to meet some wonderful people � just ask the thousand-plus people we�ve had submit success stories to us in the past few years! So, enjoy it, and follow these ten tips, and hopefully we�ll be getting a success story from you sometime soon.

Visit http://www.metromingle.com today to meet local singles in your area in a clean and wholesome environment.